Friday, June 6, 2008

the sun is up. already?

i think that most of view our children with this adoring type of sentiment, but...
this morning is one of those where i wanted to ignore the cries from the next room and sleep forever. jacob likes to trick me into believing he is asleep at night. unfortunately he doesn't sleep well without a warm body nearby. half of the time i fall asleep with him on the couch, and when i wake up and stumble to my bed, sam is already snuggled into my pillows. this is simply annoying. cooper is still contained at this point and that is the highlight.

sam is pretty self sufficient in the morning. collin turns on curious george (whom we emulate most of the day), and i lay in bed,hoping cooper sleeps or plays happily, which he does. jacob is learning bad sleeping habits and it is stressing me out! it is stressing me out. it is stressin g me out, it is stresign nme out. i read babywise, and its stressing me out. i am sorry, but it is hard to let your little baby cry, but at the same time, i need at least an hour or so without that particular ray of sunshine resting on me. when i let him cry, i feel like a bad mom. when i don't. he doesn't get enough sleep, and i feel like a bad mom. when i am not consistent with either method, and he doesn't get sleep, and neither do i, i feel like a really bad mom. so, to those who have been asking if i am having more, i say never (but so ask again in four months or so, i am sure that i will have changed my mind).

so anyone who has tips or suggestions, or just wants to make me feel better, or to commiserate themselves, leave a message at the beep.


Griffiths said...

Oh Amandaham you are not alone! My baby is now almost 10 months and we still go through similar cycles. I am not a happy camper or a good mother when I am tired, especially in the middle of the night or a morning when you have not slept all just so you know, you are not alone,(& I am glad I am not alone) and thankfully our kids do grow up and 90% of the time become better sleepers in their own beds. Hang in there! :)

Troy and Rebekah said...

I have no children and therefor no advice but here is what my mother did. She would let us cry for about fifteen minutes before she would get out of bed to check on us. Maybe this bad sleeping phase will pass? Have you prayed about it? (just checking cause sometimes I forget to pray until someone reminds me.)
Just for the record I have witnessed my fare share of terrible mothers and you are not one of them. I think that you are a fabulous mother and you can take that to the bank!